Ramblings

Hello,

I know it's been awhile since I have posted, but I am still staying on track. I had to work through some stuff last week that I found rather interesting so I thought I would share it here.

I had some very bad cravings last week. It was really cold here and the weather really affected me. I wanted some nice warm soup and bread. I struggled very badly through Tues, Wed, and Thurs. to the point where I finally told my husband that I felt like I was doing raw against my will. I know that sounds kind of odd huh? What I meant is that I know that raw works for me and it makes me feel great. I lose weight and feel alive and healthy. But it can be so hard. Sometimes I feel trapped by my food choices, or rather by what I choose not to eat. It is sort of hard to explain but in essence I was having a hard time last week and literally took it one day at a time, complimenting myself on each day I made it through. I am not the kind of person that can just have a little cooked stuff. One bite sends me over the edge and I eat everything! I wish I had the self control as some of you who can eat some SAD and then jump right back into raw. I can't do that and end up having a series of "last suppers" before getting back under control, usually a month later. So anyways I really struggled through Tues, Wed, and Thurs and just had an awful hard time with it. Then I woke up Friday morning and it was gone. There was no more battling or struggle. I was happy on raw again and didn't want to eat SAD! Yippee! I am happy to have made it over that hurdle which will only fuel me through the next one and with each obstacle I overcome I will be better equipped to handle the next.

Another interesting thing I noticed, my husband told me that he needs to go on a business trip in June. He will be gone for a total of three weeks. Originally it was just two weeks, but now it has been bumped up. When he told me I was very upset. All I wanted to do was eat something. Pizza, chips, ice cream, whatever. I wanted to stuff my sadness in food. Then I started planning in my head all the food I would make and eat while he was gone. Mind you, this was not a good list like mangoes, avocadoes, raw crackers, but rather a bad food list. I stood there literally battling within myself for ten minutes before I came out of it, and thankfully I didn't eat anything bad for me. I am obviously a very emotional eater and I still think I will have a hard time while he is away. I would much rather focus on what I can do fun with the childern while he is away and get some exercise too. That also is one of the (many) reasons that I was upset. While he is gone I can not go out jogging at all and I want to be able to do that 5K on the 4th of July. So I need to figure how I can get ready for that with him being gone. Any recomendations would be highly appreciated!

Also I did a lot of browsing this past week at other raw sites. While looking at Heidi and Justins blog at http://rawfoodrightnow.blogspot.com/ I decided to research some local CSA's and found a super little farm. I am so excited about getting fresh produce this summer from them. We went out there this morning to check it out and they are so amazing! They are growing a huge variety of food and are trying to be as self sustaining as possible. I left with a strong desire to get a greenhouse and a bag of salad greens which I am presently enjoying. I want to look into greenhouses more. It would be so amazing to be able to grow food year round and not have to buy it from the store. They even had an avocado tree! It takes 9 years for them to produce fruit but once they start they produce a lot! That would just be so amazing. I also found a co-op locally that I ordered a case of oranges through. It was a really good deal, 56 oranges for $29.00. I will get those on Friday.

So, I guess that is all. I am off now to research greenhouses!
Have a great raw day.